Sunday, August 24, 1997
First Year Being a Mother of Two
It’s been quite a difficult year, with a lot of illness and stress last winter. We’re all fine now, but it was quite a shock to find myself suddenly responsible for two littlies at once, and to discover that ALL my time goes on maintaining the children, house, garden and husband (in that order!). In the first few months of Pauline’s life I was so tired that I had to go to bed early, so there was no time for just P. and I together, or for writing letters and keeping my photo albums up to date, although that’s all changed now, thank goodness. We’ve also discovered that marital discord increases in proportion to the number of children. We disagree about everything, from potty-training, to table manners, to which bed Kevin should now sleep in! These modern husbands are great when it comes to changing nappies and doing dishes, but they can be so opinionated and stubborn about child-rearing! Don’t they realise that our innate maternal instincts are naturally superior to their acquired paternal ones?! Reverse sexism, I know.
Still, it’s probably just a phase we’re going through, to accompany Kevin and Pauline as they go through their various phases. Kevin has entered a Mummy phase and wants me to do everything that his father used to do e.g. bath, teeth-brushing, putting to bed, etc. He has also suddenly become very affectionate and gives us proper kisses and cuddles now, which is lovely. Pauline has suddenly stopped being a baby. She started walking independently only five weeks ago and already wants to do everything by herself. When she throws a temper tantrum she screams and grimaces in exactly the same way as Kevin, which is hilarious.
We celebrated Pauline’s first birthday in May and Kevin’s third just two weeks later. I’m very proud of my motherly culinary efforts, as I managed to produce a pink, heart-shaped cake for Pauline and a train cake for Kevin (traditional sexism, I know). It comprised a locomotive and two wagons, one bearing chocolate finger biscuits, the other piled high with jelly beans. It was my first experience of rampaging toddlers treading cake into the floor and smearing chocolate round the house. I grinned and bore it quite well, I think! Pauline remained unconcerned at the fuss, it was just another tea party for her. However, it was exciting to see how Kevin realised that all the attention was in his honour. He ripped paper off presents with great skill. His candle-blowing needs improvement though - I shall teach him to really huff and puff next year.
We had a lovely holiday at P.'s parents’ holiday cottage in the Dordogne in May. It was hot and sunny every day, so we had to cool off in the icy-cold river, which was a first for the children. There’s even a little stream on the grandparents’ property, complete with tadpoles - guess who fell in trying to catch them?! Kevin and Pauline saw flocks of geese and real cows for the first time!
P. and I made the most of our on-site babysitters to go out for lunch on our own. It must have been the first time in years! We had a delicious 5 course meal in a very elegant restaurant, all finger bowls, starched linen and fawning waiters. We sat on the balcony overlooking the river and watched swallows swooping past, it was heavenly and so relaxing. We stayed for three hours, and ate ourselves silly. It took us about a week to digest it all. Still, it was lovely to stop being parents for a while and feel like human beings again!
Now we’re back home and into the routine again. The weather is unbearably hot and humid, so we sit out in the garden splashing ourselves in the children’s paddling pool to cool down. Most of our friends are away on their summer holidays, so we haven’t being going out much lately. The big event in September will be Kevin starting at nursery school, mornings only at first, as he still needs a good nap every afternoon. I’m sure he’ll enjoy it, as he is not as shy with other children as he used to be, and plays so well with our neighbours. Of course the school is very well equipped with toys and games that are so much more interesting that what we have at home! Pauline and I will continue to go to the English-speaking playgroup in Fontainebleau, as she really enjoys the toys, singing and sheer noise.
Still, it’s probably just a phase we’re going through, to accompany Kevin and Pauline as they go through their various phases. Kevin has entered a Mummy phase and wants me to do everything that his father used to do e.g. bath, teeth-brushing, putting to bed, etc. He has also suddenly become very affectionate and gives us proper kisses and cuddles now, which is lovely. Pauline has suddenly stopped being a baby. She started walking independently only five weeks ago and already wants to do everything by herself. When she throws a temper tantrum she screams and grimaces in exactly the same way as Kevin, which is hilarious.
We celebrated Pauline’s first birthday in May and Kevin’s third just two weeks later. I’m very proud of my motherly culinary efforts, as I managed to produce a pink, heart-shaped cake for Pauline and a train cake for Kevin (traditional sexism, I know). It comprised a locomotive and two wagons, one bearing chocolate finger biscuits, the other piled high with jelly beans. It was my first experience of rampaging toddlers treading cake into the floor and smearing chocolate round the house. I grinned and bore it quite well, I think! Pauline remained unconcerned at the fuss, it was just another tea party for her. However, it was exciting to see how Kevin realised that all the attention was in his honour. He ripped paper off presents with great skill. His candle-blowing needs improvement though - I shall teach him to really huff and puff next year.
We had a lovely holiday at P.'s parents’ holiday cottage in the Dordogne in May. It was hot and sunny every day, so we had to cool off in the icy-cold river, which was a first for the children. There’s even a little stream on the grandparents’ property, complete with tadpoles - guess who fell in trying to catch them?! Kevin and Pauline saw flocks of geese and real cows for the first time!
P. and I made the most of our on-site babysitters to go out for lunch on our own. It must have been the first time in years! We had a delicious 5 course meal in a very elegant restaurant, all finger bowls, starched linen and fawning waiters. We sat on the balcony overlooking the river and watched swallows swooping past, it was heavenly and so relaxing. We stayed for three hours, and ate ourselves silly. It took us about a week to digest it all. Still, it was lovely to stop being parents for a while and feel like human beings again!
Now we’re back home and into the routine again. The weather is unbearably hot and humid, so we sit out in the garden splashing ourselves in the children’s paddling pool to cool down. Most of our friends are away on their summer holidays, so we haven’t being going out much lately. The big event in September will be Kevin starting at nursery school, mornings only at first, as he still needs a good nap every afternoon. I’m sure he’ll enjoy it, as he is not as shy with other children as he used to be, and plays so well with our neighbours. Of course the school is very well equipped with toys and games that are so much more interesting that what we have at home! Pauline and I will continue to go to the English-speaking playgroup in Fontainebleau, as she really enjoys the toys, singing and sheer noise.
